I'm Sorry

In my twenties, I was a lost, scared child who lashed out at everything and everyone--a fearful, broken creature, clawing my way through the darkness. If you crossed my path in those years--

I'm sorry.

In my thirties, I wasn't much better. I found sobriety at 33, but it took years for me to get back on my feet and learn what it meant to be a real man, a true friend, an honorable partner, and a decent member of society. I still didn't get it right for some time.

If I hurt you during those growing years--

I'm sorry.

Things began to come together in my 40's. I began to put the pieces together and really understand what it meant to be an adult. The grief and shame from my former years hit hard. I spent a lot of time taking stock, beating myself up for the pain I caused to those I loved. I wanted so much to tell them--

I'm sorry.

Now in my 50's, I've come to terms with life. I've healed from the guilt and forgiven myself. I haven't forgotten my past, I've learned from it. Never to repeat it. I've grown to love myself and who I've become.

So, if you knew me back then, before I grew up--I believed things I don't believe anymore, I did things I don't do anymore. 

I'm learning and growing, as we all should.

And I'd just like to say--

I'm sorry.